Anxiety is kicking my butt! Granted, it has a lot to do with the threat of war and the blazing reality of the wildfires in Australia — but, part of me knows it's a lot deeper than that.
If you're anything like me, then you had high expectations for 2019. You set goals and believed for the best. And, if you had the kind of year I had, you were disappointed because things didn't come to fruition.
Now, 2019 wasn’t bad; it was pretty decent, actually. At the end of the year, I saw growth in major areas. I even received a prophecy to, "trust the process," which I've been meditating on a lot. I was excited for 2020! But, as the clock struck midnight on January 1, 2020, I looked at my homegirl and said, "Why do I feel nervous all of a sudden?" Oddly enough, she said she felt the same thing. It was like we'd just stepped into a new dimension of ourselves, and there was NO GOING BACK.
So now, 9 days into the year, I feel pressure to produce, almost as if I am scurrying around for something tangible to hold on to from last year. I am so afraid to have another year where I don't accomplish my goals. I can’t take it! BUT, if 2019 taught me anything, it's that it's okay to feel feelings... but it's counterproductive to act on them.
So, I've been fight the inklings to go back to old habits because I truly believe that if you want a change, you have to change! I want this year to be strategic, intentional and full of self-discipline. So, I've been spending a lot of time with God, working on my foundation in the following areas:
No. 1: Getting organized. Seriously though, Janet can NOT be me this year! I ain't able! lol. My hands are in a lot of pots, and I believe God is presenting me with new relationships and opportunities to help me live out my purpose. I don't want to fumble any of it! In an effort to as effective as possible, I have to better manage my time and resources. Being all over the place is the worst feeling when you're trying to build something that's going to last. I was listening to a podcast that talked about creating a budget for the time in your day. So, I started assessing my time and priorities. I realized that in order to get everything done without pulling my hair out, I needed to wake up earlier, actually use my calendar (I am super forgetful), and be slower to commit myself to things. I highly suggest creating a budget for the time in your day. It's eye-opening and makes you feel better about what you can do, as well as what you can't.
2. Writing the vision, without constraints. At my church we're working to improve the organizational structure of one of the teams I am part of. One day, we were putting together a chart of what the team SHOULD look like to operate effectively. I got overwhelmed. I thought, "Where are all of these people and resources going to come from? Maybe we should dial back this plan a bit." But, one of my team members corrected me. She said, "We want to operate in excellence! With a structure in place, God can meet us with we need, but we can't invite people into something that's not organized." Little did she know, she was breaking a chain of "lack mentality" over my life. I used to plan for what I had (or foresaw myself having)... instead of what I was believing God for. But that's the opposite of faith! Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen. The "evidence" we produce includes the planning and preparations that make room for new blessings! I am so excited about this new perspective because I now feel free to write, dream and create without self-imposed boundaries. Write your vision, big — without fear of how it will get done. No. 3 takes care of that part!
No. 3: Praying, often. I wasn't always comfortable praying, especially in front of other people. I never understood its powerful until I started using it in various ministries and service groups (that's why service & community is so important to growth). Seeing people delivered and free — it's made me more confident in its power. Today, I know when I speak to My Father, He responds. And, because I don't know what I am doing in this season, I need Him to tell me what to do! Praying not only gives me confidence and direction, but it also reminds me to be obedient. It's a waste of time to pray about something you've already received an answer for. We don't have time for that (refer to No.1, lol). January is the perfect time to pray and fast with a church or even on your own.
That about sums it up, for now. I hope this helps you like it's helping me! I think the real fear we face with each new year is that life is short. We are blessed to be here another year, and we want it to mean something. I promise you, if you get busy TODAY, your goals CAN get accomplished this year. Put the work in, every day, to see it through! Pray for me, and I will pray for you! 2020 WILL be our year!
Grow In Peace! :)